As a parent, educator and person trying to build a business from home, I’m always on the lookout for great resources. That’s why I was thrilled when I discovered I made an OOPS. Or should I say, found an OOPS. In this case OOPS is a good thing because it stands for Our Overnight Planning System for Education and Business. The mission of OOPS is to “provide ‘Just in Time’ technology, business and productivity strategies for the unpredictable challenges or ‘OOPS’ moments in the classroom and boardroom.”

There are so many things I like about OOPS, but here are a few of my favorites:

Summer: School on the Net

This page not only provides dozens of resource sites, broken down by age group, of what to do with your children over the summer, but includes a handy acronym to help you remember how to enjoy your “web vacation” . . . P.A.C.K. Play, Adventure, Create, Knowledge.

Best of the Web: Sites for Online Searching

While I know about the major search engines, I had no idea that there were so many other available tools to help with online research! On this resource page, these search sites are broken down by categories including: best multimedia sites, specialty search engines and best fun tools sites.

4OOPS Tech Tricks Blog

This blog is written by Helen Teague, M.Ed., who does educational and small business consulting, in addition to managing the OOPS site. She shares strategies on how to use technology to maximize your effectiveness in education and in business.

So I highly recommend you check out this valuable resource. It’s one OOPS you can afford to make!

Every day I struggle with balancing the work I want to do with the work I have to do.

I want to work on each of my blogs and on building my business.

I have to do the laundry.

I want to hang out on Twitter.

I have to pay the bills.

I want to submit photos and look at others’ photos on Flickr.

I have to unpack this stinky pile of wet, dirty clothes from my daughter’s camping trip.

I want to read my friends’ blogs and find new blogs to read.

I have to clear the clutter off the counter, yet again.

I want to continue writing my novel and finish the children’s book I started a decade ago.

I have to sort the kids’ clothes into what doesn’t fit them anymore, what can be saved, what should be given away, and then unpack their spring and summer clothes. I really, REALLY, REALLY HATE THIS CHORE!

I wish I could say the struggle is getting easier, but it isn’t. I still hate doing the laundry and the other mundane tasks. What is getting better though is how I fit in the “have to’s” around the “want to’s.” For example, I put in a load of laundry each morning, clear the counter, and start the dishwasher while my baby is eating her breakfast in the high chair. When she naps, I dash to the computer to get some of the work done I want to do. At lunchtime, I move the clean load of laundry to the dryer, put another in the washer and pay the bills at the kitchen table while my baby eats her lunch in the high chair. I really do appreciate that high chair! When my baby watches Sesame Street (so, so cute to hear her giggle), I dash back to the computer to get more work done that I want to do. This flip flop between the work I want to do and the work I have to do pretty much goes on all day. On the good days that is.

There are definite pros and cons to working at home. While we all know I’m a “believer in balance,” today I’m going to focus only on the cons of working at home. (To be true to my moniker, I’ll write about the pros another day. ) Today, it’s all about the cons. Well, actually, just one con really . . . work at home parents don’t get sick days! We don’t get paid vacation either, but I said I’d limit the post to one con. I don’t want to be too negative!

When I worked outside the home I got five sick days a year. I miss my sick days. Not because I’m sick a lot. Not because I even used them that much. But because they were always there when I needed them. I could use my sick days not only when I was sick, but when I had doctor and dentist appointments.

Now, as a work at home parent, I’ve had to take my baby with me to the dentist, doctor and to that oh so dreaded appointment with my ob-gyn. When she was an infant, it wasn’t such a big deal. She would usually stay content in her car seat. When she didn’t, I’d give her a bottle. No biggie. What’s the problem then? She outgrew the car seat and started walking. The nerve of her! Her developmental milestones have made going to these appointments quite a bit more challenging!

At my last ob-gyn appointment, my toddler got so fussy I had to hold her on my lap. Yeah? During the appointment. So? While my feet were in the stirrups! Oh. Oh! Now you get the picture. Frankly, if I could’ve grabbed my camera, while balancing my baby on my belly with my legs propped open, I would have! It seriously was a sight to be seen. (From the waist up of course! )

I had to do the same balancing act at the dentist too. While I was pleased to have my pants on this time, it was a challenge to keep my toddler from ripping that machine thingy that hangs over your head out of the ceiling while keeping my mouth open and trying not to wince at the ear-splitting amplified sound of finger nails being dragged down a chalk board that water pick makes.

So do I want to work outside the home to get my sick days back? Not a chance. The pros of working at home so outweigh the cons. However, I will force myself to get up even earlier so I can nab the first appointment of the day. That way my hubby can watch turbo tot before he goes to work while I get that quality time by myself in the stirrups. Lucky me.

As you may have read, I’ve feeling a bit down this week because a close friend and I are growing apart. So I was particularly thrilled to get some good news today. I found out this morning that I won the Mother’s Day quote contest at Blogtations! If you’re interested in reading what quote the judges picked, here it is.

For all of you mothers out there, I hope you have a wonderful, relaxing, balanced, stress-free Mother’s Day!

Going to the doctor’s office can be anxiety provoking for children. This is often because they either don’t know what to expect, or remember getting a shot the last time they were there and don’t want to get another one. However, parents can help their kids be more relaxed about going to the doctor’s office. Here’s how.

Acknowledge Their Feelings

Allow your children to express their concerns. Just the act of saying them out loud can help reduce their anxiety. When they are done sharing what worries them, tell your children that you understand how they feel. Let them know that even though they’re scared, it’s important to go to the doctor’s office to help them stay healthy.

Tell Them What to Expect

Parents can help reduce their kids’ anxiety by helping them understand what will happen during the doctor’s appointment. One way to do this is by reading books to your child about going to the doctor’s office. There are a lot of great books on this subject, including Going to the Doctor by Anne Civardi, Corduroy Goes to the Doctor by Don Freeman, The Berenstain Bears Go to the Doctor by Stan and Jan Berenstain, and What to Expect When You Go to the Doctor by Heidi Murkoff. While reading these books, it’s helpful to insert the name of your child’s pediatrician as the name of the doctor in the book. Also, add or omit details to make the book more relevant for your child’s experience.

Another way to help children understand what will happen at the doctor’s office is to have them play with a toy doctor’s kit. You and your child can take turns pretending to be the doctor and use the stethoscope and other medical items to give each other a check-up. Then your child can pretend they are the doctor giving a check-up to one of their stuffed animals.

Be Honest About the Shots

Shots are often the most dreaded part of a doctor’s appointment. Therefore, it’s important that they understand that the doctor gives them a shot to help keep them healthy. When discussing how it feels to get a shot, don’t tell children that the shot won’t hurt; instead, tell them it feels like a pinch and will be over quickly. Be honest with your child if any procedure will be uncomfortable because if you tell your child something will not be painful and it is, your child will be less likely to trust you in the future.

Provide Comfort and Praise

Provide comfort and praise to children while they’re at the doctor’s appointment. In addition to soothing words and physical affection, it helps to bring along a favorite stuffed animal or blanket to give them a sense of comfort and security. Your support and understanding will help your kids gain confidence and influence their ability to cope in the future.

Give Them Something to Look Forward To

Parents can help reduce anxiety in children about going to the doctor’s office by giving them something else to think about. Therefore, it helps to give your child something to look forward to after the appointment. This could be going out for ice cream, having a friend over, or going home and playing a game together.

These suggestions can help reduce your child’s anxiety about going to the doctor’s office and therefore help the visit go more smoothly.

It’s crazy how busy we all are.

• Busy working part-time and full-time inside and outside the home.
• Busy parenting, chaperoning, disciplining, spending time as a family.
• Busy driving to soccer games, girl scouts, music lessons and field trips.
• Busy doing laundry, yard work, housework and grocery shopping.
• Busy checking homework, signing permission slips, packing lunches and doing school projects.
• Busy volunteering our time and talent to help others.

I get it. We’re all busy.

But are we too busy for friends?

Sadly, I’m beginning to think so. Two days ago my close girlfriend and I could not find a date we could go to a movie together until July because of our kids’ extracurricular schedules. Yesterday I played phone tag yet again with another close girlfriend because our available times to talk aren’t coinciding while we both try building our businesses while raising three girls.

But today was the kicker that really drove the point home.

Another close girlfriend and I got into an argument. Our first in 18 years. What could possibly trigger an argument after all this time? You guessed it. Our busy schedules. Or more precisely, her busy schedule and me not being sensitive to the demands placed upon her time. As the mother of three girls, who’s working part-time outside the home, building a business inside the home and who spends five nights a week at a soccer field, the irony is painful.

But instead of being mad, I’m sad. Not because we don’t talk once a week like we used to. Not because she told me today that due to the “direction her family is moving in” she won’t be able to continue our annual visits that we’ve maintained for more than 15 consecutive years. Not because she told me months ago she wouldn’t be able to come to her God daughter’s First Communion because she didn’t want to miss any of her kids’ extracurricular activities. Not because the gift she sent for my daughter’s first birthday was more than three months late. (She said she didn’t forget and that it had been sitting on her counter the whole time.)

I’m sad because I’m no longer a priority for her. In her defense, she’ll say that’s not true. But actions speak louder than words.

So while I understand that we’re all busy, I still think it’s important to keep friendships a priority.

Take five minutes to call and say “Hi” even if you don’t have time to fully catch up.

If you don’t have five minutes, take one minute to jot them an email.

And if you buy them a birthday gift, make the effort to get it there reasonably close to their birthday.

These days, it’s not the thought that counts. It’s the effort.

My seven-year-old daughter’s First Communion was yesterday. So of course I took a bunch of pictures. She looked so beautiful!

Afterwards as we were enjoying brunch back at our home, the usual joke came up about how I always take a ton of pictures, but no one ever gets to see them because I’m over a year behind on ordering prints. Right now I have 2,104 photos in my “yet to be ordered” photo folder and I haven’t even downloaded my pictures from yesterday! I guess they have a point.

But who has time to put pictures in photo albums?

I used to, but not anymore. Not with three kids, a growing at-home business, a part-time job outside the home, my kids’ full-time extracurricular schedule and double digit loads of laundry.

That’s why I was thrilled to learn I can create photo albums at Snapfish.com where your first 20 prints are FREE and you get 4×6″ prints as low as 9-cents! So instead of ordering hundreds of prints and having them sent to my house, where I’ll leave them on the kitchen counter or shove them in a closet until I get around to putting them in photo albums (which at this rate will be never!), I can have my photos sent to me in photo albums with captions for less money than I usually spend ordering prints and buying albums at Target. (I usually spend $10 on a photo album and .19 cents to print each photo for a total of $29 for an album of 100 photos. An 8×11 photo album with 20 pages from Snapfish.com starts at $19.99.)

This time saver is perfect for me and anyone who wants their pictures in photo albums, but just doesn’t have the time to sit down and do it. I haven’t even started my fifteen-month-old daugther’s baby book yet, but here’s what I think about that!

If you have a daughter, take the time to read this. It could save her a lot of heartache. Not to mention stomach aches, headaches, missed days of school, lower grades, eating issues and depression.

The sad truth is that every school, whether public, private or parochial, has girls who bully. I bet you can still remember who they were when you were in school. As a School Counselor and mother of three daughters, I know firsthand - both personally and professionally - how much it hurts when girls are targeted by bullies.

The old adage “sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me,” couldn’t be further from the truth. While boys usually bully through intimidation, girls bully through exclusion, also called relational aggression. Here’s an example of relational bullying taken from my professional experience:

“Heather” was miserable because “Leslie” was not only saying mean things to her face, but getting the other girls in the class to exclude her with the age old line “You can’t be friends with me, if you’re friends with her.” In our sessions, Heather would complain that she didn’t have anyone to play with because the girls were afraid that if they hung around her they’d become Leslie’s next target. Leslie had immense influence over the social dynamic among these girls.

In order to improve the situation, I had to not only reduce the power Leslie had, but empower Heather as well. Here are some ideas that helped, adapted for use by parents:

* Ask for specifics when your daughter says girls are bullying her at school. Who? Where? How?

* Tell the principal and classroom teacher the specifics of how she is being bullied. Have them tell other teachers (i.e., gym, art, music), recess aides, hallway monitors and cafeteria staff so that everyone who comes in contact with her can be on the lookout and poised to intervene.

* Explain to her that reporting an incident is not the same as tattling, and have her tell an adult at school when she is being bullied.

* Encourage her to stick with a friend at recess, lunch, in the hallways, on the bus or walking home because she is more likely to be targeted when she is alone.

* Teach her to convey self-confidence by walking confidently, with her head up. Girls bullying at school target those they think are weaker.

* Pay attention to how she is sleeping, eating, feeling and doing in school. If you notice changes in any of these areas, have her see the School Counselor.

* Arrange opportunities for your daughter to socialize with her friends outside of school to help her maintain a strong social support system.

In Heather’s case, these steps alleviated the problem. But because it’s tougher to catch girl bullies, it’s extremely important for girls to tell an adult if they’re being bullied. Unlike boys, who usually bully physically, girl bullies often spread rumors, whisper as their target walks by, talk loudly about a party she wasn’t invited to, give her the silent treatment, and as discussed above, tell others not to be friends with her. School personnel are there to help, but in order for them to be able to do anything about girls bullying at school, they must be informed when a bullying situation arises.

To read more about girls bullying at school, I recommend the following books:

Odd Girl Out: The Hidden Culture of Aggression in Girls by Rachel Simmons

Queen Bees and Wannabees: Helping Your Daughter Survive Cliques, Gossip, Boyfriends and Other Realities of Adolescence by Rosalind Wiseman

If you’re like me, you hate to have to stop working to figure out what to have for dinner that night. It’s at these moments I always wish I had a live-in chef. Then one day it occurred to me, I have not one, but two live-in chefs looking for something to do!

So, instead of stopping my work for the afternoon, I asked my kids:

“Would you like to pick out what we have for dinner?”

“Yes!!!!!”

Before they could answer that they wanted ice cream sundaes and chips, I explained that they’d need to do the following:

1. Pick out a dinner recipe from a cookbook.

2. Check to see what ingredients we already had.

3. Make a list of ingredients we needed from the grocery store.

They jumped at it! I quickly learned that what’s a chore for me is fun for my kids!

So while they busied themselves in the kitchen looking at recipes and checking for ingredients, I kept busy at the computer. It was a win/win situation. I got more work done and didn’t have to think of yet another dinner idea. They relished the responsibility and got to pick a meal they were sure to like.

After they made their decision and the list was completed, we all went to the grocery store. It felt like an outing, instead of an errand!

When we got back home, they couldn’t wait to start making the chicken nuggets with honey-mustard dipping sauce from Emeril’s There’s a Chef in My Soup! cookbook.

Not only did my kids enjoying cooking dinner, especially when they got to shake the chicken in a bag of seasoned corn flakes, we loved the meal too!