Feelin’ Lonely

Lonely Entrepreneur asks: After quitting my corporate job to focus on my own business, I’m feeling in between worlds. I just can’t seem relate to the 9-5 mentality anymore. There are so many cool things going on in my life right now, but it feels like the cubicle dwellers can’t understand my life or what I’m dealing with. Does there have to be a rift between us?

Dear Temporarily Lonely,

First off, huge props for making the leap - it is one of the scariest things that you can do. It takes some serious cajones to make the switch from cubicle dweller to fearless entrepreneur. What you just did counts as a major life-changing decision. It’s exciting and fulfilling, but I’m not going to lie to you, it can also feel lonely.

It would be nice if everyone understood the magnitude of what you just did, let alone supported it, but that’s asking a lot. Some people will be happy for you. Some will be shocked. Some will be threatened and some won’t know how to react. You will grow new relationships and you will have to let go of others. Letting go of people in your life can be difficult, but holding on to relationships that aren’t working can hold you back, bring you down and be even more difficult than letting go.

Now, about those people in your life who aren’t as supportive as they used to be… There are several reasons this is happening to you (as well as many other entrepreneurs who have made a switch like yourself).

Fear: They might truly be afraid for you as they need security in their lives and they try to impose that on you. They might not know how to relate to you because you are going through some significant changes in your life. And as you become truer to your calling, you may find the rift growing.

Jealousy: Yes, there are people (many people) who are jealous of what you are doing. The jealousy is related to fear as they might be too afraid to take a risk like you have. The fact that you have taken a risk is causing others to look at their own lives and dreams - they might want to pick your brain on how you did it, or they might belittle you because of their own insecurities. Hey, you know you’re fabulous when you start to inspire jealousy!

Fear and jealousy can manifest in ways that try to undermine what you are doing or even make you feel bad. How much time should you spend explaining and defending what you are doing in your life? That’s really up to you, but in order to keep moving forward in a focused and clear direction, I would suggest that you not spend much time at all on this. There are people out there who will support and respect what you are doing, you might need to let go of some relationships that aren’t working to make room for ones that will.

How to manage:

Get out there and network. Meet others who are doing what you’re doing or who have made similar changes in their lives. There are plenty of meetups, entrepreneurial organizations and other groups out there - find them.

Nourish your supportive and healthy relationships.

Stay positive and redistribute some of the energy you were wasting back into you and your business.

There are so many amazing and inspiring people out there. It’s just up to you to get out there and meet them.

To becoming more fearlessly yourself!

Starla