I asked Aurelia Williams of Real Life Coaching to pop in with some advice for our Sparkplugging Interns.  They have taken on a big project working with me and the other Sparkplugging Authors for ten long weeks – on top of their own busy lives and businesses.  I want to make sure to give them extra encouragement along the way and I couldn’t think of anyone better to help me do so than Aurelia.

Are you ready to learn the secret to success?

If you follow the five simple suggestions below, you will find that you will be able to accomplish more success than you ever thought possible!

Step One: Keep your eye on the prize

You know how it goes. You start a brand new project and are filled to the brim with enthusiasm. Some time passes and you are still happy about the project, but you start noticing the difficult things.  More time passes, and you’re no longer enthusiastic at all, but keep going because you know it has potential. Finally, you start to question why the heck you are doing this in the first place. Then it happens.  A new project pops up. You feel excitement start to build again, but for this new project instead of your current one. You decide this one will be MUCH better, and jump ship to pursue this new, exciting opportunity. Sound familiar?

Fortunately, there is an easy remedy for this. Commitment!

I know, that seems too simple, but it’s true. Setting clear, realistic goals and vowing to remain committed no matter what it takes. If you continually bail out on yourself and your goals, you are training yourself to believe that your goals are not important. And as your goals seem less important, you will be tempted to quit before you even start. Instead, set daily reminders about your goals so they stay fresh in your mind and you will stay encouraged to achieve them. Make the resolve to finish what you start – no matter what – and you will be shocked at how much you can accomplish!

Step Two: Manage work efficiently and avoid procrastination

If I could only tell you one thing about how to manage your workload, it would be to make a plan and stick to it as much as possible! Proper planning is the key to saving time and getting things done. Prepare ahead of time, ideally the night before. Make a prioritized list of things that need to be done on a day to day basis and resolve to finish those tasks no matter what!

For some people, completing all the tasks on their prioritized list will be easy. However, others may run into procrastination issues. Why do people procrastinate?  Often times, they are trying to avoid a difficult task. It’s no secret that tasks that take longer are less desirable than those that can be completed quickly.

Many people decide to do desirable tasks first, regardless of how important these tasks are. The problem with this is that people sometimes fall into the trap of unconsciously allowing themselves to be consumed by enjoyable “busywork” instead of more important tasks.

Making a resolve to finish the biggest, most important tasks first (enjoyable or not!) will give you a sense of accomplishment that will make the other tasks on your list seem like a breeze. Do this, and you will keep procrastination at bay!

However, others procrastinate for deeper reasons. Sometimes procrastination is due to fear of failure. No one wants to be embarrassed by a lack of knowledge or skills, so it’s easy to try to avoid doing those tasks that make you afraid or uncomfortable. However, it’s important to realize that motivation comes from within. Coming to grips with personal issues is the first step in realizing why you procrastinate. Once you do so, you can start taking steps to chance.

Step Three: Learn from criticism

Let’s face it, it can be hard to hear someone tells us our faults! But criticism can be much more useful than you may think, and is one of the keys in you growing to reach your full potential. It really is in your best interest to accept the criticism, apply the suggestions, and grow throughout the process instead of allowing yourself to become defensive or upset. This may be difficult to understand and practice, but I guarantee it will help you. If you learn to accept criticism, you will begin to see yourself grow in ways you never thought possible.

Step Four: Keep a positive outlook

In order to achieve success in life, you need to think positively about yourself and your chances for success. Many people mistakenly believe that being positive and thinking optimistically is just part of someone’s personality – either you’re born an optimist or you’re not! However, this is simply not the case. Being optimistic and motivated is an acquired habit, a skill that can be learned and developed just like any other skill.

In order to become optimistic and motivated, you need to become conscious of your “inner voice.” Listen to the words that you say to yourself in any situation. When you catch yourself saying something negative, immediately stop and put a positive spin on it. So a negative thought like “I hate it that this bad thing happened to me!” could be changed into “I understand that this bad thing has happened to me so I can learn and grow from it.” Try doing this for a month, and I think you will be absolutely amazed at how energized you are about not only your work, but your life in general!

Step Five: Leave time each day for reflection

In today’s busy world, it is all too easy to get caught up in going through the motions. However, truly successful people know that reflection is one of the best ways to keep yourself on the fast track to success.

Try this exercise:

At the end of the day, try to reflect back on the hardest part of the day, then ask yourself the following questions:

• What did I learn from that experience that will help me in the future?
• How can I that experience to help improve myself or my future?
• How can I do better next time around?

This will allow you to see that no matter what happens, it always can be used as a learning opportunity and springboard for bigger and better things. After you finish reflecting on the hardest part of the day, reflect on positive aspects of the day. Doing these daily reflection exercises truly will keep you focused, positive, and committed to your goals and you will find yourself achieving your success faster than you ever thought possible.

In conclusion, success is not the mystery that some people seem to think it is. I’ve laid out great steps for you to take towards your success and I’m not going to lie to you — It will take hard work and dedication on your part to do these steps day in and day out. It will be a long road, but the reward will be so worth it. By doing these 5 steps, I have no doubt in my mind that you will accomplish any goal you set and will be an enormous success at whatever you do.

When I take on a new client, I ask them to fill out a questionnaire before we begin working together. One of the questions is: “Success means different things to different people; what does success mean to you?”

It seems like a pretty basic question at first glance, but when you really think about it, it’s fairly loaded. Your answer might sum up why you chose the business you did, how you feel about your family, what global issues are important to you, how important your physical and mental health is, what money means to you, and more. I’ve learned that very few successful business owners will describe success simply as running a profitable business. In fact, that is often one of the last things mentioned. The business is typically a means to the end; a way to accommodate values that represent whole life balance.

Another interesting and telling point is that many of the people who answer this question are thinking about it for the first time. Now I ask you, how can you possibly achieve success if you don’t know what success means to you? If you don’t even know what success is? It’s like trying to achieve goals that you’ve never set! Achieving clarity around your definition of success is a great start to growing a successful business and living a balanced life.

As an entrepreneur, success is probably one of your top values; one of the things that is most important to you in the world. So give this question some serious consideration. Ask yourself, “What is important about success to me? How do I define success?” Remember, this is YOUR definition, not that of society as a whole. This is all about YOU – Yay!

Now, if you respond by saying that you must have a profitable business and be highly regarded in your field, that’s great. But I challenge you to look at the bigger picture. If you achieve those things, but don’t have any time to spend with your friends and family, will you feel successful? How about philanthropic activities? Will you feel successful if you can’t devote time and money to causes that are important to you? Or – I don’t know – say… if your company adds to the effects of global warming? What if you feel and act like a total Scrooge to keep your company profitable and you don’t treat others in a way that’s in harmony with your ideal values – in the way you like to be treated? Will you feel successful if you make a profit, but have to work 12-hours a day to do it? Some people would say yes, some would not. And that’s ok. Remember, this is YOUR definition of success.

Well, you get the idea. Knowing what success means to you today will help you to build your ideal company tomorrow. Your company is an extension of you; identify and define your most important values and apply them to the way you run your company and live your life – inside and outside of work. This is a critical layer in the foundation of a sound business and a happy lifestyle. So, hello, my name is Marla and I’d like to ask you a question: What does success mean to you?

John Jones III http://www.10minutes.org asks:

When should I consider a business coach, if at all?

Great question, John.

Since I am a business coach, you’re probably expecting me to say, “John, if you’re serious about your business, you should have a coach. In fact, all business owners should hire a coach.”

Nope. I’m not going to say that. A good coach knows when a client isn’t ready. A desperate coach will take anyone.

Let me explain.

First off, you can hire a coach at ANY stage of your business, but that doesn’t mean that you should. Think about it this way. A coach really is like a personal trainer. A trainer can help you if you’ve just started out on a new regimen, bored with your workout routine, trying to lose weight or training for something big. Kind of like your business. Anyone can hire one, but if you’re not going to stick with the program, it won’t be a good use of your time or money.

So here is my Am I ready to hire a coach quiz:

1. Am I willing to make the financial investment? Coaching isn’t cheap, at least good coaching isn’t. It’s a long-term investment. Yes, you will see some benefits up front, but don’t go into it as a last resort or expecting a quick fix. Real change takes time, so be sure that you’re willing to make the financial investment to make it happen.
2. Am I ready to really TRY? Like most things, you will get out of it what you put into it. If you just show up each week and expect the coach to do all the work, guess what? You’re quickly going to wonder why you’re paying someone for a bunch of questions. It’s the client’s job to go into each meeting with objectives for the meeting, updates, and questions. It also means that your coach will be pushing you to take action between meetings. Are you ready for some accountability?
3. Do I need a push? No matter how self-motivated you are, sometimes you need a push, new ideas or motivation. Again, think of the personal trainer. If you’re feeling stuck in a rut, that is the perfect time to hire a coach.
4. Do I need objective feedback? Face it, your friends and family have a vested interest in your choices and they’re probably not shy about telling you what they think. Sometimes you need a sounding board, not advice.
5. Are you willing to get naked? To make any real change, you’ve got to get naked. That means that you have to be willing to look at the stuff that’s held you back in the past. It’s vulnerable, scary and humbling. If you’re willing to go there, you and your coach can make huge strides.

If you answered yes, then the next step is how to hire a coach. That’s a whole ‘nother post, but I’ll leave you with this. You are hiring someone to be your partner. They are going to go through a lot with you, so make sure you want them in your inner circle. Trust. Connection. Respect. Those are the makings of a successful coaching relationship.

Hope that helps, John.

Starla

This week we are launching two channels I am particularly pleased to present to you. Both of them will cover some of the things that I used to cover on my own blog, so I do believe you will want to read and/or subscribe to them, as I’ll be writing a bit less on these topics.

Let’s just skip to the intros. I’m too excited to babble on about anything else.

Ask the Coach :: 3 Business Coaches, a Wealth of Business Answers

Regular readers might remember when I used to take on coaching clients. Readers here loved both my coaching insights on my blog as well as one on one. As much as I have always loved coaching people, Sparkplugging became a full-time job. I had to start turning away clients.

Ever since then, I have felt a little hole here on this site. I have relied so heavily on both business and life coaching in my own life I felt this site was incomplete without this resource for our readers.

I hand-picked the coaches involved in Ask the Coach, Marla Tabaka, Starla Sireno and Edward Mills. All of them have coached me at some point in time. They are a tremendous resource and they will answer your questions for free on Ask the Coach.

WAHM 2.0 :: This isn’t Your Mother’s Work at Home Business

When I realized I had to shift the focus of my own blog, I realized I couldn’t continue to focus on Moms anymore. I had a really hard time letting that go – in fact, only felt OK with that decision when the amazing Kelly McCausey agreed to write a blog for WAHMs on Sparkplugging.

Kelly has been a leader and advocate for work at home moms online for way longer than I have. And Kelly has some seriously great experience and internet business advice. She has produced WAHM Talk Radio since November of 2003.

Kelly knows that being a work at home mom today means something different than it did back in the day. And she is seriously one of the best people out there to help you get started.

I couldn’t be prouder of these two new blogs! Please give our new authors a warm welcome and get some great advice from them in the process.

I’m supposed to be well rested and revived on Mondays. But in preparation of launching with a new name *tomorrow* (we hope!), I worked over 25 hours this last weekend. My kids are so getting tons of mommy time when this is over!

And in honor of our last day as eMoms at Home, I thought it only fitting that I wear my Technorati Hottie shirt, because it’s going to be a while before I can put this thing on again.
Am looking just a little bit tired in that there photo…

So needless to say, with all the work that still needs to be done, I’m not in need of motivation as I am in need of, well, sleep. But Monday Motivation MUST GO ON, so let’s get this over with so I can get back to work and give you anxious readers your brand new site!

So, what is the Monday Motivation drill?

Step 1 – let us know what you are going to get done today (your to-do list, so to speak).

Step 2 – put it in a comment below or a post on your own site.

Step 3 - let us know what will motivate you to get it done – a reward, consequences, or whatever you need to think that will ensure you do what you say you are going to do. I’ve found that the public announcement and accountability is a particularly great motivator, but throw down consequences if you really need a kick in the pants to get stuff done! Unless, of course, you are working towards a new laptop too, in which case I think the reward is particularly motivating.

We don’t care how you get it done, we just want to support you in reaching your goals.

Today I have so much to do that I don’t want to make my usual promise of getting through my inbox – and I apologize profusely to any of you who are waiting for a response from me. But there are a couple of things that I HAVE to get done today:

1. Finalize new author contracts and send them to at least 6 of our 13 new writers
2. Respond to any outstanding advertising inquiries
3. Send out 5 emails to contest sponsors

Leverage :: If I don’t have all of this done by the time I go to sleep tonight, we won’t launch tomorrow and you will KILL me! But I’ll also give one of you $100 cash, just to keep in tradition with my usual tradition of building accountability into my day.

So what are you going to get done today?

Yet behold, the signs of life:

Repeat after me:

I will not play hooky until my deadlines are met.

I will not play hooky until my deadlines are met.

I will not play hooky until my deadlines are met.

So, what is the Monday Motivation drill?

Step 1 – let us know what you are going to get done today (your to-do list, so to speak).

Step 2 – put it in a comment below or a post on your own site.

Step 3 - let us know what will motivate you to get it done – a reward, consequences, or whatever you need to think that will ensure you do what you say you are going to do. I’ve found that the public announcement and accountability is a particularly great motivator, but throw down consequences if you really need a kick in the pants to get stuff done! Unless, of course, you are working towards a new laptop too, in which case I think the reward is particularly motivating.

We don’t care how you get it done, we just want to support you in reaching your goals.

Today before I go to sleep I will:

• Clean out my inbox of 462 emails
• 3 loads of laundry
• Finish changing WordPress settings all new blogs
• Create thumbnails for each blog
• Call Kelly McCausey

If I don’t get all of this done by the time I said I would, I will give a Kiva Entrepreneur another $250.

So what are you going to get done today?

This week is my crunch week. Next week, I guarantee you my house will look like this.  I am praying, *praying*, that we can relaunch next week with our new name. Of which yes, since you asked, has been chosen & obtained, and will remain a secret for just a little bit longer.

I have so much to do I can’t even begin to figure out what to put on my Monday Motivation list… but since this little kickstart to the week is starting to become a popular habit among many of you, I had better pull myself together and figure out what needs to be done.

What is the Monday Motivation drill?

Step 1 – let us know what you are going to get done today (your to-do list, so to speak).

Step 2 – put it in a comment below or a post on your own site.

Step 3 - let us know what will motivate you to get it done – a reward, consequences, or whatever you need to think that will ensure you do what you say you are going to do. I’ve found that the public announcement and accountability is a particularly great motivator, but throw down consequences if you really need a kick in the pants to get stuff done! Unless, of course, you are working towards a new laptop too, in which case I think the reward is particularly motivating.

We don’t care how you get it done, we just want to support you in reaching your goals.

Today before I go to sleep I will

1. Set up emails & adserver with new domain information
2. Clean out my inbox of 203 emails
3. Send out new logo info for authors to review

And before the end of the week I will

1. Have all pages set up in new root level blog
2. Have all settings/plugins/widgets set up in 2 new blogs
3. I’m scared to commit to anything else because that is a crapload of work right there

If I don’t have all of this done by the end of the week, I will have 15 pissed off authors on my hands. I’m quivering in my bunny slippers at the mere thought of that.

So what are you going to get done today?

Last week was both extremely unproductive and yet I moved mountains. I opened up the discussion on rebranding eMoms at Home, and I got an earful. I spent every waking minute on naming, branding and research. Which unfortunately meant that I didn’t do a few things on my list from last Monday. So I picked three random participants from that day, and will the following people please send me a 125×125 ad for your site:

Selene M. Bowlby

Ria Kennedy

Suzie Cheel

This week I’ll have to throw down a little steeper leverage, because my inbox is spiraling out of control and I’m close to a decision on a new name. Which means no. time. for. slacking.

So what is leverage and what is Monday Motivation anyway?

Step 1 – let us know what you are going to get done today (your to-do list, so to speak).

Step 2 – put it in a comment below or a post on your own site.

Step 3 - let us know what will motivate you to get it done – a reward, consequences, or whatever you need to think that will ensure you do what you say you are going to do. I’ve found that the public announcement and accountability is a particularly great motivator, but throw down consequences if you really need a kick in the pants to get stuff done! Unless, of course, you are working towards a new laptop too, in which case I think the reward is particularly motivating.

We don’t care how you get it done, we just want to support you in reaching your goals.

Before I go to sleep today I will:

• Clean out my inbox of 504 emails (I’m SOooooo bad!!)
• Do four loads of laundry
• Spend 30 minutes on author contracts
• Email Megan
• Meditate

I’d usually also put up a list for the week, but knowing I have a mountain of work ahead of me, I’m not going to commit to specifics. I’ve found the hard way that jumping into a rebrand is way more unpredictable than I ever could have imagined!

If I don’t have all of this done by the time I go to bed tonight, I will give a Monday Motivation participant $300 cash.

There. That should make sure I don’t get off track.

So what are you going to get done today?

Speaking of which, Char threw down a reward to a Monday Motivation participant if she didn’t get her list done – and she didn’t, which might have had something to do with their new family member Fritz:

So that means that Andrea gets some free advertising on one of Char’s blogs. Now aren’t you glad you were productive last week?

Today I’ll throw out the same offer – a free banner ad that will be featured in a new theme I am rolling out very soon – so if I don’t get the stuff done below, one of you fine readers gets a free month of advertising on this site!

So what the heck is Monday Motivation anyway?

Step 1 – let us know what you are going to get done today (your to-do list, so to speak).

Step 2 – put it in a comment below or a post on your own site.

Step 3 - let us know what will motivate you to get it done – a reward, consequences, or whatever you need to think that will ensure you do what you say you are going to do. I’ve found that the public announcement and accountability is a particularly great motivator, but throw down consequences if you really need a kick in the pants to get stuff done! Unless, of course, you are working towards a new laptop too, in which case I think the reward is particularly motivating.

We don’t care how you get it done, we just want to support you in reaching your goals.

Before I go to sleep today I will:

• Clean out my inbox of 308 emails
• Put up GoDaddy’s new ad campaign
• Set up my adserver for the new theme across all blogs
• Write up my rebranding post

And before the end of the week I will:

• Have new logo created
• Have everything Steve needs to him by Tuesday
• Legal contracts to authors updated and sent
• Posts up about SOBCon and for my Inspired Entrepreneur blog

If I don’t get this done by the time I said I would, heck, one of you – let’s make it three of you – get a month’s worth of advertising for free on eMoms at Home.

So what are you going to get done today?

Except for February.

Living in Chicago SUCKS in February. It’s snowy, dirty, dark, miserable, and *everyone* has cabin fever as we long for spring. Just about the only thing to do in Chicago in late winter is taxes and cleaning. …woot. /sarcasm

So I’ve decided I want to get a jump on spring and do a little cleaning today. We’ve cleaned the house this last weekend, but today I plan on cleaning up my office. I’ve cleaned it a lot recently, but just give my kids 30 minutes or so and all my hard work is for naught.

So tops on my list today is making my office a sparkling heaven, one which makes me feel like airy & light, and makes it easy to stay on top of my never-ending list of things to do. If you need a kickstart, Brandie recently wrote a great series on Organizing your Home Office (Parts 1, 2, 3) that will make it a snap for you to get going.

Here’s the Monday Motivation drill.

Step 1 – let us know what you are going to get done today (your to-do list, so to speak).

Step 2 – put it in a comment below or a post on your own site.

Step 3 - let us know what will motivate you to get it done – a reward, consequences, or whatever you need to think that will ensure you do what you say you are going to do. I’ve found that the public announcement and accountability is a particularly great motivator, but throw down consequences if you really need a kick in the pants to get stuff done!

We don’t care how you get it done, we just want to support you in reaching your goals.

Today before I go to sleep I will:

• Clean/dust my entire desk & office
• Make my sleeping arrangements for the SXSW Interactive Conference – done!
• Change my flight for SXSW to go to Blog Network Camp – done!
• Empty out my inbox of 195 emails
• Take my kids to Baskin Robbins for a treat for cleaning their rooms

And to keep my momentum up from last week, I’ll also commit to having done by the end of the day Friday:

• Create my ad rate card & advertising promo package
• Set up 4 blogs
• Work 2 hours on my friend’s blog
• Find and buy a domain name for my brother
• Bring my car into the shop
• Write up copy for 3 landing pages

Leverage :: If I don’t do everything I said I would do, I will dye my hair jet black (yikes!). Last week, I wasn’t able to get one of my things done because I had a login issue on my other blog. So I reserve the right to not enforce this *only* if something out of my control prevents me from doing it.

So, what are you going to get done today or this week?

But when I go too long without being able to keep myself disciplined with my work, I start taking more drastic measures to get myself back on track. In the last few weeks, I have been eating better, drinking tea instead of coffee, taking vitamins, doing creative projects, and getting out of the house more often. But when these things weren’t bringing me back to my normal level of focus, I knew I had to bring out the big guns.

I hired a business coach. And not just any coach, she’s also been one of my best friends for over 8 years. I can’t bull$hit this woman, and she and I both know it.  She has also helped 5 women grow their businesses to over $1 million dollars in revenue. So I get the best of both worlds, a shoulder to cry on and a tough business-savvy entrepreneur-wrangler.

You’ll hear more and more about our work together, but for now, it means I have my nose to the grindstone and it’s not exactly pretty. I’m fine at creating my own motivation – it’s the discipline I need a little help with.

So today I’m going to do two lists – today’s list and this week’s list. Hope you’re willing to get things done with me this week!

Today before I go to sleep I will:

• Empty out my inbox
• Install two programs on this computer
• Do three loads of laundry
• Clean my office that the kids trashed this weekend
• Post two more articles to this blog and my Inspired blog

By the end of the day Friday I will:

• Have new theme mocked up
• Buy ticket for SXSW (unless for some weird reason I decide to drive)
• Work 1 more hour on my business projections
• Work at Starbucks at least one morning
• Email two old colleagues from Socrates.com
• Create new vision board
• Meditate 3 times

Leverage :: If I don’t have all this done by the time I say I will, I will donate an additional $250 to a Kiva entrepreneur (or 10 Kiva entrepreneurs if they still have that annoying $25 limit going on!).

So what are you going to get done today, tomorrow, or this week?