Comments on: Happy Birthday :: Giving Your Child A Choice

By: gifts for men

gifts for men — Fri, 14 Nov 2008 18:13:47 +0000

Giving a Choice is always good. But unsupervised choice , i dont think thats such a good idea.

By: Damien

Damien — Sat, 16 Aug 2008 01:51:35 +0000

Hey Derek. I got back on RSS again so you may see more of me. Anyway, our son is 10 and we have given him that same option the past couple years. This year I got a surprise 5% raise retro to last year so he got the party and the wii and guitar hero … spoiled brat! Ah, it’s fun to do sometimes when you can.

By: Derek Semmler

Derek Semmler — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 15:20:00 +0000

@Kelvin :: Lol, after playing Rock Bank I have to say it is a little too involved for my tastes but the kids love it! Although I think our game is defective as I completely rocked as a singer yet it said that I failed, bah!

By: Lin

Lin — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 14:33:48 +0000

Derek, this is great! Giving children choices and options in life from a young age really helps kids learn that they can't have everything they want. I love it! Lins last blog post..What Parents Owe Their Children

By: Joe

Joe — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 13:54:47 +0000

There’s an added benefit in this case that you seem to have missed. His friends will want to play Rock Band with him, so he’ll be hanging out at home. You won’t have to worry about him being unsupervised somewhere else and possibly getting into trouble.

By: Kelvin Kao

Kelvin Kao — Thu, 14 Aug 2008 06:42:16 +0000

Once upon a time (as in http://www.sparkplugging.com/the-man-page/dad-profits-from-his-son-smoking-weed/), you said Rock Band looks too involved for your taste. Hm…

I think it’s great that you are giving the boy choices. Really, it’s one of the most important thing for a kid to learn is that he’s responsible for the consequences of the choices he makes, whether awesome or awful.

Kelvin Kaos last blog post..Puppet Design and Puppet Stage Design

By: Matt McGee

Matt McGee — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 20:54:21 +0000

We do the same thing now, Derek. We offer a party, or the child can receive the money we would’ve spent on the party as his/her gift.

Giving kids a choice and teaching them to live with the choices they make — even if it’s something like friends, birthdays, gifts, etc. — is a Good Thing.

By: Daniel

Daniel — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 16:49:27 +0000

My wife and I try to give our kids as many reasonable choices as possible.

Our daughter was born ON Thanksgiving Day. So, her friends are usually gone on vacation when her birthday rolls around. We gave her the option of more gifts for her actual birthday or having a “half birthday” party with her friends in the summer. For the last two years she’s chosen to have less gifts, but a birthday bash in the summer with all her friends.

To your point, Derek, it’s not about encouraging them to be materialistic, it’s about giving them choices and teaching them how to manage the consequences, good or bad, of their choices.

By: Jeremy (Discovering Dad)

Jeremy (Discovering Dad) — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 15:54:37 +0000

I like the idea of giving your kids a choice. For us, the majority of parties are with family moreso than friends. We’ve never been big on dozens of kids coming to the house, and I can’t see us spending the kind of money it takes to have a party elsewhere.

I really like the concept of teaching your kids to make choices in this regard though. Thanks for sharing this Derek, and I hope your son enjoys rocking out with Dad! Happy Birthday to him!

By: Miranda

Miranda — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 15:51:05 +0000

Great post! I love the idea of teaching children to choose between things. So often, we simply let them have it all now. Which is part of the reason so many of us are in so much credit card debt.

At any rate, this type of decision can be applied several times throughout life. We did it with our wedding. Do we want to spend a ton of money on one day, or do we want to make more lasting memories in better home? Needless to say, our wedding was rather modest.

By: JLow

JLow — Wed, 13 Aug 2008 15:36:26 +0000

Not really anything to do with birthdays, but….

My sister lives in Singapore now; our family is from / still lives in Malaysia (it’s only a 4-5 hour drive between KL the capital and Singapore); she married a Singaporean you see.

Her kids are in their teens. Kids of that generation on this side of the family total 13 in all (15 if you count my latest additions), with 10 of them in Malaysia. Their ages are very close to each other; except mine the late comers.

When the annual holidays come around for them, my sister will always ask them to choose between a trip to the US (possibly the likes of Disneyland) or KL.

Guess where they choose?

No matter where you go, it’s the company that counts!