Comments on: Life Balance Requires Mind, Body, And Soul

By: Derek Semmler

Derek Semmler — Wed, 24 Oct 2007 03:51:09 +0000

@JLow :: Thanks for sharing a little more detail about your situation and how you have been trying to make it work. It sounds like you have an outstanding bond with your daughter and she is very lucky to have that. Do your best to keep that time with your wife as well!

@ToddlerDaddy :: I hope you enjoyed the fruits of your executive decision and had some time with the kids and your wife. I’m guilty of the same habits as I will try to get home to have some time with my kids and then get back to work once they are in bed.

By: JLow

JLow — Tue, 23 Oct 2007 07:59:02 +0000

It’s like what an ex boss once told me: There will always be another job (to apply for), but there’s only one wife.

Another simpler but true quote, from my older brother: Work will never finish! (he’s actually saying work *should* never be finished, otherwise they don’t need you!)

By: toddlerdaddy

toddlerdaddy — Tue, 23 Oct 2007 03:56:36 +0000

This post is certainly food for thought. Of late to try and ensure time with our two little ones I have been leaving the office earlier than I otherwise would, heading home to spend a couple of hours with them, before logging straight back into work remotely from home to do another few hours work.

I think I just realised in my desire to spend time with my kids, while juggling work, that I have completely ignored spending some time alone with my wife. This is particularly bad given that of late I have not even made it to bed until my wife has already been asleep for a few hours.

That’s it, and executive decision has just been made, I am logging off and heading home early today. Spending time with the kids, then some time with the wife.

And even skipping and afternoons work I have a feeling that the world won’t end afterall……..

By: JLow

JLow — Fri, 19 Oct 2007 07:19:54 +0000

It’s funny, you’ve just described my wife, & I am the one sending the IM’s!

Between the 2 of us, she is the workaholic. You may even say she is fast assuming the bread-winner role.

I don’t have a problem with her salary being higher than mine. I don’t mind that she is more familiar with all things corporate, has a better network, more ambitious than I, etc.

I do mind that she comes home very late, almost every night. Yes, I do trust her. It really is her work (attitude).

Without getting into the details of the causes & symptoms, we did make an “agreement” that Wednesdays would be alone-time just-us-2 dinners (though I gotta say that I have been guilty of “Hmm I wonder what Caitlin [our 3 yr old] is doing now..”!) But sadly, that’s also kinda forgotten.

My inlaws look after our little girl during the day. It’s come to an “arrangement” now where in the morning before wife wakes, I’d send Caitlin over to my inlaws before work, & pick her up after work, entertain, feed, change (ok we have a live-in nanny who tags along) & put her to bed, all before wife comes home. Most times I am even already in bed when she comes home.

When wife is home, she’d watch her pre-recorded Anime series. I know she enjoys them & it relaxes her, so even when she watches them when I am around I leave her to it.

I can’t say I enjoy this arrangement or not, but I have gotten used to it…

Weekends are really the only time when we are together. But that’s when I am the one needing the relax time!

By: Damien Riley

Damien Riley — Fri, 19 Oct 2007 05:33:36 +0000

Definitely no kids! We left them with my folks. It was such an awesome getaway. Best of luck my friend, choose somewhere with cool sheets and maybe a jacuzzi!

By: Derek Semmler

Derek Semmler — Fri, 19 Oct 2007 04:56:32 +0000

Damien, I’m sure the IM from my wife included some of those same words.

When you went to Catalina, was that with or without the kids? It is funny that you mention that though as I had immediately thought that I should schedule a little weekend getaway for next weekend.

Thanks for the feedback!

By: Damien Riley

Damien Riley — Fri, 19 Oct 2007 00:15:45 +0000

Great points here Derek. I think as husbands we have no problem giving attention to our kids but often forget to give our wives that amount of our time.

A couple years back I got a call like the IM you mentioned only it was with a few more words than what you indicated. I immediately made my next call to a travel agency and we went to Catalina for the weekend.

We shouldn’t wait for our wives to tell us we aren’t taking them out and/or vacationing with them enough. We shouldn’t, but we do sometimes I am afraid. I’ve done OK since then I think. We are Going to Vegas for the weekend in a couple weeks so we’re excited about that. I haven’t decided if I’ll bring the laptop . . . I’ll probably ask her input there!