Vacation = Irresponsible Parent
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Comments
According to the school district that my children attend, parents are acting irresponsibly if they schedule a vacation during a time that school is in session.
This was brought to light recently as a friend of mine is planning a family vacation that will result in their kids being out of school. When they notified the school that their children would be absent due to the vacation, they received a letter from the school principal as well as their children’s teachers stressing the importance of regular attendance.
The letter indicated that parents need to demonstrate responsibility for their children attending school and that the school discouraged parents from taking students out of school for a vacation.
Here is an excerpt from the Parent Handbook distributed by the school,
Families are strongly encouraged to plan vacations/trips during school holidays and over the summer months. If your child is going to be absent, other than illness related, for more than two (2) consecutive school days, you need to complete the REQUEST FOR SPECIAL ABSENCE (blue form) located at the back of this handbook. Any request for an absence of four (4) or more consecutive days will result in a letter from the principal stressing the importance of regular attendance. If your child will miss more than ten (10) consecutive school days, you must withdraw your student from school and re-enroll him/her when you return.
There is a similar section in the Student Rights and Responsibilities Code that indicates,
Parent/guardians are discouraged from taking students out of school for vacation or for non-school sponsored events. Any absence from school is a serious handicap; not only to the individual student, but also to our entire school system.
When I was a child and my parents took me out of school for a family vacation, I don’t recall my parents receiving any type of letter indicating that they were being irresponsible. I do remember my teacher assigning me a project to maintain a journal on my vacation and then provide a report to the class upon my return.
Instead of being chastised for taking a vacation, I remember my school embracing it as a learning opportunity outside of the normal lessons found in the classroom.
I strongly believe that traveling with your children opens a wealth of learning opportunities and is something I would like to do much more with my own children. Giving your children the chance to explore new cultures, customs, and experiences is hard to duplicate inside the classroom.
Apparently the school system no longer believes that to be true.
Or do they no longer feel there is value in a family vacation because the amount of their state and federal funding is determined by school attendance and test scores?
What is the real motivation behind these warnings from the school?
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WTF?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!
I’d add to this comment, but I’m quite speechless.
That doesn’t happen very often.
Wendy, I thought about including our experience from last year but I didn’t want to lose control. We received a similar letter when our son was in the hospital for two weeks.
There weren’t any calls or letters to see how he was doing or if there was something wrong. Instead we received a letter indicating he had missed too many days of school and we had a responsibility to ensure our children did not miss school.
Don’t get me started!
I think its a reflection of the type of travel MOST parents schedule their children for during the school year. Skiing without lift lines, and Disney World without lines are two that come to mind. These days, children need to learn more and the pace is quicker than when we (I) was a kid, so time lost in the classroom becomes hard to make up. That said, we took ours out for one week when the oldest was in second grade. We had heard, and still believe, that once they hit third grade they miss too much in one week. But hey! There are still 3 months in the summer.
Derek, are you flipping kidding me?
At least here in California, public schools get paid by the state per child per day. When you take your child out of class they don’t get their funding for that day.
I loathe formal schooling, and I would be tempted to tell them to go [inappropriate] themselves — except for that clause about having to re-enroll after 10 days. That’s a real sticky one!
And my oldest just started Kindergarten this year and I plan to take him out of school all Thanksgiving week. Cross your fingers I don’t get a nasty note!
We had a similar situation recently.
My wife and I adopted a daughter from China in 2002. She is now 5-3/4 and started kindergarten in September.
2 years ago, we started the process of adopting a 2nd daughter. We planned all along to take our 1st daughter when we returned to China and introduce her to the land of her birth.
We hoped to travel before school started. As it turned out, we weren’t scheduled to leave until September 14th which was a little over 1 week after the first day of class.
As soon as we knew our travel date (around 1 month prior), I told the teacher that our daughter would be gone for 2 weeks. She thought it was awesome. I also told the principal.
Upon our return, we received 2 letters from the principal informing us of the importance of school attendance and penalties for excessive truancy which could include jail time for parents.
Yep…jail time.
We had a little word of prayer with the principal.
I’m a public school teacher and I hear the hate all the time so some of the sentiments here are old hat.
BUT, you should know that I myself have taken my kid out to go to Disneyland, etc. and taken the same flack for it. Guess what, I’m going to keep on taking family vacations with my kid out of school anytime I feel it’s in the best interest of my family
Curse the system, not the people because people work hard in public schools for your kids with good motives.
Riley out
As a teacher — I really think it depends on the type of travel. I teach high school and I never can understand why people yank their kids out of school for a week during classes when they have all sorts of scheduled holidays that they can use. That being said — trips like going to China to see the place you were born and to meet a new sibling — that is completely understandable! A trip to Europe — once in a lifetime — go for it! Disney world without lines — and then the parents come back and make my job twice as hard when they want everything ready for their kid RIGHT and ALL of my extra time during lunch and after school to help their kid understand the stuff she missed … sorry, but I don’t agree with that.
Man oh man derek – this reminded me of getting pulled out of school when my parents didn’t pay the mandatory contribution ( yes they were required in addition to pay tuition to also contribute 10% of their salary) and when they didn’t I got pulled out of class and they had to come write a check before I could go back to school
excuse me??
Family. Remember family, education is important but not more important than family.
My mom would get mad at me – heck it’s their problem they chose to send me to that silly school in the first place
Mother Earth
aka Karen Hanrahan
http://www.bestwellnessconsultant.com
@John :: You’re right that kids today are learning things at an earlier age than I remember as a child. Our oldest is in 3rd grade this year and there has been a noticeable shift to him being more independent/responsible for his homework and there are more expectations placed on him. It does make it difficult to miss an extended period of time.
@Wendy :: I wish I were, we were not happy parents to receive that letter after our son spent two weeks in the hospital.
@Erika :: Here is to no nasty notes when you take your child out of school over Thanksgiving!
@Doug :: Thanks for sharing your story. It is that kind of learning experience that makes me feel an absence from school is well worth it. I wish that I could say I was shocked by the letters you received but I am not.
@Damien :: As I’ve told you before, your students are lucky to have such an outstanding teacher. There is no doubt that the teachers work hard for our children but as you noted the system is flawed. As parents, we work hard for our children as well and receiving a “nasty gram” from the school when we take our kids on a vacation and being told we are irresponsible parents is not good for anyone.
@Erika :: You make a valid point, however it is not always possible as a parent to align your time off with the holiday schedule of your children. For instance, some jobs require coverage by one or more employees during holiday periods and vacation time from work may not be approved. In an ideal world, our work schedules would align perfectly with school schedules but that just doesn’t happen.
@Mother Earth :: That couldn’t have been easy as a child to get pulled out of class for failure to pay. Thanks for the feedback!
I really am beginning to think that the world is so caught up in doing the ‘right thing’ and being success and rule driven that we have as a species forgotten how to have fun.
Two weeks out of school is not going to have any effect whatsoever on the rest of your life other than you may have some great memories to look back on when you are older.
Luckily for us, us Aussies tend to be a little more laid back about such things. Let’s face it we are having a public holiday next week for a horse race, so a couple of weeks off school is nothing.
We got a similar letter last year when we took our kids out of school for a week to travel to Ireland for my grandparent’s 60th wedding anniversary and a once in a lifetime family reunion.
My kids learned so much more in that one week than they would have learned in school. We got work in advance and made sure that they were caught up shortly after they got back. It was the 3rd week of school for crying out loud – they were still reviewing everything most of them forgot over the summer.
Travel is a great way for kids to learn and not every trip can be scheduled over the summer.
As a married, work-at-home father of three kids, I’ll agree that it’s important to keep the kids in school. Heck, I wouldn’t get anything done otherwise. Yet, since we’re relentlessly demanding good grades – and our kids seem to be getting the message – a few days off every now and again are both arguably acceptable and defensible.
Case in point: My son took seven consecutive school days off last year to attend a travel hockey tournament in Quebec, Canada. I spoke to his ‘team leader’ teacher at school, highlighting the history of the tournament, the fact that teams come from around the world to play in it, and the cultural significance of the event and the city. AND, since Zack was pulling the grades and we’d be holding study hall daily (which we did, btw, so it wasn’t just a lie to get the teachers to accept it), they should agree and offer no resistance. I was prepared to take it to the school board (which the year before had instituted a policy dictating that five days missed any marking period [or nine weeks] would result in a parent / administrator conference – or expulsion).
Not only did they agree, they encouraged the travel as a cultural experience and asked to hear about it from Zack when he got back.
The net-net here: teachers often are more on the kids’ side than the administration. While I understand the school board’s need to nip habitual tardiness or truancy in the bud, there have to be exceptions for those families who support the school system’s mission to educate – even if it includes travel during the school year.
But if they offer resistance, we as parents have to be prepared to fight back. In hockey, I think they’d call it a clean hit.
As a teacher and a mother I cannot understand why you would want to take your child out of school for a vacation. When the child returns he has piles of work and SOMEONE has to teach him the objectives. Then SOMEONE has to keep riding them until they return all the work. I’m sure your pat answer would be that the teacher should gather together all the work before hand and the parent will teach them the objectives and see that the work gets done, either in the car, on the ski lift or at the Magic Kingdom. This of course never happens satisfactorily and it is left to SOMEONE to explain to the parents why grades dropped that term. Grow up! Public schools are for the public. They aren’t there to make YOUR life easier. The rules that many think are unfair are rules that have to be enforced to keep hundreds of children with hundreds of backgrounds educated. Just because you have enough money to go on a vacation in the middle of the winter doesn’t mean that your kid is entitled to extra time and free tutoring from someone who is overworked, underpaid and trying to educate 25 other children.
@Kim :: Believe me, I am well aware that many teachers are underpaid as my wife is a preschool teacher. Her W2 arrived recently and she wanted to cry.
As for the remainder of your comment, I do believe a big part of the policy is a result of federal funding. That plays a larger role than many care to admit. As for the missed work and the need for someone to “keep riding” the child to do the work, I do believe this is the responsibility of the parent. There is no doubt that some parents will expect the teacher to do all of this but not all of them will.
As the husband of a teacher and a father, I can think of numerous reasons to take my kids out of school for a vacation. Apparently we disagree on that point but I appreciate you stopping by to share your thoughts.
Derek, Your kind response showed me how hateful my rant sounded. I had come home from a terrible school day in which I had had a nasty e-mail from a parent and spent my planning period teaching a C student how to subtract fractions with re-grouping. He was freshly back from a ski trip with his parents and missed the original lesson. I’m not usually a hateful person and wanted to apologize. I do know that children learn invaluable lessons in geography, social sciences and familial relationships while traveling. I have no idea about federal funding but I was only looking at this issue from my frustrated (that day) viewpoint.
@Kim :: Thank you for the explanation. I can appreciate the way you were likely feeling that day and did not feel that you were being hateful. Hopefully you will stick around and share your thoughts on more topics!
Please don’t irritate me with the notion that teachers are overworked. Overworked is a relative term that sepends on your range of experience. My husband is a Psychologist who teaches teachers how to teach. Those teachers wouldn’t come to his classes if they didn’t receive monetary benefits. As if
occupational education wasn’t an incentive in itself. Which is crazy to me. The expecations and standards of public school teachers seem to be set by an environment that is more similar to a snow globe than the real world. The school system is a closed environment that does not earn its keep like other businesses. Its employees are not under the same type of pressure as say the people who work at intel.
It’s not always easy for parents to coordinate the time they can take for vacation. Sometimes this must happen during the school year. Its family time and that is okay. I am sorry if some teachers feel overworked because they sometimes have a little homework. I teach history at the University- I understand.